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When I was in my younger days,
I weighed a few pounds less,
I needn't hold my tummy in...
To wear a belted dress

But now that I am older,
I've set my body free;
There's comfort of elastic...
Where once my slim waist used to be.

The inventor of those high-heeled shoes
My feet have never forgiven;
I have to wear a nine now...
But I used to wear a seven.

And how about those pantyhose..
They're sized by weight, you see,
So how come when I put them on...
The crotch is at my knees?
Now I need to wear these glasses
As the print is getting smaller;
And it wasn't very long ago...
I knew that I was taller.

Though my hair has turned to silver
and my skin no longer fits...
On the inside, I'm the same old me...
Just the outside's changed a bit.


Well enough about me.
Let's move on to some fun things to do.